Writing Wednesday: Discomfort with Verbosity

Stats from last week: Made my regularly scheduled three blog posts, and my quota of comments on the blogs of others. I still don’t have any open markets to send “Schizo the Magnificent” or “Truth in Advertising” to – I probably need to expand my market selections. “Date Night” completed its release weekend; my next ePub will be June 21st.

I’m disappointed in my efforts on Swordsmaster last week; I only put parts of two days into what is supposed to be an everyday occurrence. I’m 30% through the current revision of Swordsmaster; I logged 457 words of fiction; Swordsmaster sits at 92,553 words.


One of the things I’ve learned from reading successful, PUBLISHED writers is that it is apparently okay not only to go into what feels to me like unnecessary detail, but to repeat variations of that same detail in the same book. Of course, I should have also remembered the tradition of Homer and other story-tellers, to use a formula description whenever mentioning a character or a place, as though they are part of the name itself.

Padding – pah!

I have to fight with myself to flesh things out – I’m uncomfortable with “padding” my work with extra verbiage. But this padding is expected, especially in longer formats. When you write a novel, readers expect you to take a little longer to tell the story, and to put the effort into defining a scene, describing a character, or setting the mood. (maybe part of the reason I have a problem with doing this myself is because I as a reader find my eyes glossing over when the descriptions start taking up most of the page.)

Another problem (coming from INFERNAL Internal Editor) – the feeling I have that what I write won’t seem monumental enough to the reader to explain why the characters are reacting as though they’ve just heard the most amazing thing. Either I’m too much of a perfectionist (my significant one would laugh at that notion), or I don’t have enough faith in my story. Regardless of the psychology of why I feel that way, I should take heart that even great writers seem to fall short at times. Towards the end of The Wheel of Time, Elaine gives a speech to the troops that comes off incredibly lame to me, and the author is no slouch (yes. I know Robert Jordan didn’t write those last three books, but Brandon Sanderson is no slouch, either.)

The feeling that what you’re ABOUT to put on the page just isn’t good enough is one of the many varieties of WRITER’S BLOCK. Remember – A WRITER MUST WRITE, what you thought to write doesn’t matter until you WRITE it.

I’m trying to achieve two things during this revision of Swordsmaster – resolve any notes I’ve left in the margins (make a decision instead of kicking the can down the road), and flesh out some of that sparcity. It’s becoming more natural to me to add words that I previously would have seen as unnecessary fluff. I hope this is a good thing (and I wonder what will happen when I finally get back to short fiction? Will I be TOO verbose? We shall see… if I EVER get back to short fiction…)

As is often the case, the right solution is an option somewhere in the middle; moderation in all things. Just saying…


The release weekend is over for my latest ePub. “Date Night” is a speculative fiction shortDateNightCover story with a bit of paranormal romance for flavor. It’s also the third of my stories to earn an Honorable Mention in the Writers of the Future contest.

Sometimes our demons are all we have. A modern-day witch pins her hopes on an unusual dinner guest.

“Date Night” is available at several online retailers, including, but not limited to:

Smashwords:  https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/934885

Amazon:  https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07QV52ZQF

BTW – all ten of the Smashwords coupons were claimed for a free copy of “Date Night.” (There hasn’t been a review posted yet, but maybe they just haven’t finished reading it yet. Well, I can hope…) Even though the coupons have run out, you can still download and enjoy “Date Night” (sure, it’s not free anymore, but consider paying the 99-cents and give it a read anyway – just saying…)


William Mangieri’s writing – including his previous release “Reining Cats and Dogs” (#7 ReiningCatsAndDogsCoverin the Herc Tom, Champion of the Empire series) – can be found in many places, including, but not limited to:
• Smashwords:  https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/NoTimeToThink
• His Amazon Author page:  http://www.amazon.com/-/e/B008O8CBDY
• Barnes & Noble:  http://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/william-mangieri?store=book&keyword=william+mangieri

• His site on WordPress:  https://williammangieri.wordpress.com
• “William Mangieri’s Writing Page” on Facebook at:  http://www.facebook.com/NoTimeToThink
• His Goodreads author page:  http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/6893616.William_Mangieri
• Or on twitter: @WilliaMangieri

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